I’ve been seeing a therapist – yep, some poor guy listens to whatever bounces around the head of Everyday Clay. I’ve been going a few weeks, and I think it’s working. Maybe progress could be measured by less complaining, but that tree may take a while to bear fruit.

Choosing a counselor was almost as hard as deciding to go. Credentials matter, but I’d rather therapists post winning percentages like football coaches. A winning record might suggest success, though it could hurt job security. Therapy isn’t about winning, it’s about managing the game.

I’m wacky enough to get unsatisfied with contentment. If I “awakened” or became “healed,” I’d feel compelled to spout phrases like “wherever you go, there you are” or “he who knows himself is enlightened.” Trust me – wherever I go, it’s me, resisting change and not getting to know myself.

After surfing the web, I found a mental wellness establishment with a wide variety of counselors. Then I realized I knew some of the therapists. Two I had to rule out immediately – not for lack of expertise, but because their dog is my best friend. Somehow, I’m friends with a dog rather than the humans. Animals are easier; they don’t argue on social media or make small talk.

My wife Shannon and I see this canine weekly during our exercise route. We’ve met the owners, polite and intelligent, and learned they work at the very place I’d found online. But I couldn’t risk mixing my therapy life with my dog friendship. If my issues became too much, our relationship – mine and the dog’s – could be in limbo. Walking a different route would ruin my obsessive routine, and my complaining would reach new heights.

So I chose a therapist named Kevin. And it’s been good. Kevin is helping me discover something I’ve always known: it’s okay not to feel okay. It doesn’t have to be a stigma.

Recently, catching up with an old friend, I proudly said, “Did I mention I’m seeing a therapist?” expecting awe. Instead, he replied, “Me too, what’s new?” That, right there, felt like progress. Two men in their late 40s casually talking mental health like the weather – there may be hope for us yet.

I think my complaining has decelerated, though you’d have to ask Shannon. You’ll know when she closes the complaint department – I’ll be walking a new path alone, and it won’t be because of a dog and his therapist owners.

Clay Bowen is a Columbus native who cooked professionally as a chef in fine dining for 12 years and appeared on the third season of Top Chef. He is also a licensed landscape horticulturist. Email him at [email protected].