It’s been a busy week here at the Honey Badger Homestead.
We harvested honey for the first time: 22 pint jars full of golden deliciousness.
We have picked up school schedules and rolled up 100 burritos for the freezer and bagged up tomatoes to go in the canner this fall. I have blanched squash and cooked lemon curd and made granola bars and cultured Greek yogurt and sourdough bread.
I guess I thought I needed to make All the Things in preparation for my return to school this week.
But then, on Monday, we made a terrible discovery: the bees were gone.
We lost the entire hive – and all the honey we hadn’t harvested – to small hive beetles.
It was especially crazy to discover the bees were gone because on Monday, the colony seemed vibrant and thriving. The comb and honey looked beautiful.
And then, in a week – poof. All gone.
I guess the good news is that it appears the bees absconded and were not killed by the beetles. I imagine they are off somewhere now, living their best bee lives.
And we are left to read up on how to check for and keep invaders out of the next hive. Assuming we have one.
So now, in addition to back-to-school shopping and lesson planning and classroom-assembling, I am washing bee frames and buying permethrin to soak the ground beneath the hives.
What I’m saying is… there is not much time left for meal prep. I need to transition to quick meals a little sooner than I’d anticipated. So it’s lucky that I got a wild idea this week to try to replicate the new crispy chicken burritos from Taco Bell.
I tried them… and, y’all, they are good. So good.
But honestly, I’m so cheap. And they are $5.49. Each!
I was raised in the ‘80s and ‘90s! When I hear “Taco Bell,” I think “.59, .79, .99, gotta run for the border.”
They shouldn’t have made that jingle so dang catchy if they didn’t want me to realize three decades later that their prices have increased 10 times faster than my paychecks.
So the next day, I set out to make something comparable for a fraction of the price.
It would take at least 10 burritos – and probably more – to feed my family of five. That comes to $54.90. If we got, say, 14 to be sure everyone was full, the total is just under $77.
I cannot run to the border and pay that much, y’all. I’m sorry. I just can’t.
Fortunately, I did the math on these homemade versions. Using prices from Walmart and store brands for everything except the chicken (I prefer Tyson) and the dressing (I think only Chick-fil-A makes it), I figured I can make around 14 burritos for just under $23. The total is actually lower than that, as you’ll likely have leftovers of everything except the chicken.
And honestly? It’s not much more work than going through the drive through.
Thank goodness. Because it looks like I have a beehive to remodel.
COPYCAT CRISPY CHICKEN BURRITOS
Ingredients
1 bag breaded chicken breast patties or chicken tenders, found in the frozen section
1 package flour tortillas, soft taco or fajita sized
1 bag shredded cabbage (frequently sold as coleslaw mix) or finely shredded lettuce
1 carton pico de gallo (or make your own with diced tomato, onion, jalapeno and cilantro)
1 bag finely shredded cheddar cheese or Mexican blend cheese
1 bottle avocado Ranch dressing (look for it in the refrigerated section or substitute regular Ranch)
Directions
■ Bake breaded chicken according to package directions. While chicken bakes, pull out other ingredients. If desired, wrap tortillas tightly in a foil pouch and place in oven next to chicken for 5-10 minutes to warm through.
■ When chicken is cooked, remove from oven. If chicken strips are wider than about 2 inches, slice them longways to make thinner strips. To replicate the Taco Bell experience, place one or two strips of chicken in the middle of one tortilla, top with shredded cabbage, pico, and cheese, and drizzle on a bit of avocado Ranch. Wrap up and enjoy.
Amelia Plair is a mom and high school teacher in Starkville. Email reaches her at [email protected].
Amelia Plair is a Starkville resident who writes occasional food columns.
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