Lindsay Miller considers herself a “yes” person, especially at her job.
She has “jumped around the math department” in her 10 years at New Hope High School, teaching various levels of algebra and even taking on duties as department head. Miller also coordinates the school’s homecoming festivities, from the ballots for queen and maids to organizing the parade and the coronation ceremonies.
This past school year, as COVID-19 pushed schools nationwide to reinvent how they delivered instruction to students while also trying to keep them safe from the virus, Miller taught both virtual and in-person classes.
“She’s probably up at the school right now,” NHHS Principal Matt Smith said of Miller in an interview Sunday afternoon. “It’s crazy how much she works. … She’s a student of what she teaches, too, constantly going to training and learning as much as she can about it. Then she shares that knowledge with our other math teachers.”
That work ethic earned Miller honors as Lowndes County School District’s Teacher of the Year in 2020-21.
For Miller, who grew up on a farm in Uriah, Alabama, saying “yes” to helping others is a way of life.
“Whatever you need, I’ll do it,” Miller said.
Even so, before she agreed to marrying her husband Jason, he had to say “yes” to something first.
“He had to be willing to be a foster parent,” Lindsay said, something that turned out to be no problem for her husband of now 14 years. “Ever since I was a teenager, I’ve always enjoyed taking care of kids.”
Foster care, unlike adoption, is designed to provide temporary homes for children who have been removed from their parents’ care by Child Protective Services.
The Millers, who are licensed to foster ages 0-5, welcomed their first placements — two little boys — in 2017 and kept them for about a year and a half. Now they are taking care of a 7-month-old girl Miller expects will be with them for about 22 months.
“As a foster parent, you see yourself as a buffer,” Lindsay explained. “You have to be a cheerleader, an advocate for the child. You have to protect the child. … The goal from the start is to reunite the children with their parents.”
To be a foster parent in Mississippi, Lindsay said, the most direct way is to apply through the CPS website. After completing the interest form, applicants must complete background checks, training courses and an interview process, as well as have their home inspected and licensed for foster care.
The Millers have gone through the training twice, and Lindsay is impressed with how it’s evolved.
“When we first took the classes, it was like watching videos from the 1950s,” she said. “Now, they are looking at more research on the psychological aspects of a child being removed from their home … and the different things the child has experienced, such as neglect.
“Every child we’ve had has needed physical therapy or some sort of early intervention,” she added. “You have to do whatever you can do (as far as setting up those services) to make it easier for the parents when the child goes back.”
Another key aspect of fostering is having a strong support system, something the Millers have found at New Hope High School and through their New Journey Church family.
“Your heart has to be in it, and you have to have a strong support system,” Lindsay said. “Our big thing is to love others, to minister to others. That’s what keeps us going.”
If ever the parents of a foster child placed with the Millers have their rights terminated, the Millers will attempt to adopt the child, Lindsay said. But during the foster care process, she said they “fight” alongside the social worker to restore the broken family. That means the Millers build and maintain relationships with those parents they hope will last long past when the children go home.
“It’s coparenting with the (biological) parents as they complete their court-ordered process,” Lindsay said. “Everybody has their own sin and struggles they have to deal with. It just looks different for different people. … We’re rooting for the parents and we’re never trying to take someone’s child. Ultimately, the parents have been through trauma too. I’m just trying to show them ‘I am your family friend.’ With that mindset, you can stay connected after the child goes home.”
That, of course, comes with its own grieving process for foster parents when children leave their care. The two little boys the Millers first fostered once called them “mom and dad” (with the understanding they had two moms and two dads). Now, they are just “Lindsay and Jason.” Still, the Millers attend the boys’ birthday parties and occasionally have them over to their home.
As time has gone by, and the Millers have settled into the “family friend” role, Lindsay has discovered it has its own advantages.
“We get to be the ones to spoil them rotten,” she said, laughing.
Zack Plair is the managing editor for The Dispatch.
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