What do you do when you’re outside with nothing better to do? For many of us, the answer is “play something.”
My family and I spent the better part of last week at the beach. Like any Gulf Coast vacation, the crowd was a mix of families with young children, high school seniors-slash-college sophomores (they’re basically interchangeable) and empty nesters. Despite the differences in attire, sunscreen preferences and music volume, this diverse group all had something in common: They brought sports to the beach.
Over the span of five days, I witnessed (or participated in) no fewer than 14 athletic events, including frisbee, paddleball, paddleboarding, surfing, boogie boarding, soccer, volleyball, spikeball and lacrosse, among others.
Of course, any comprehensive ranking of sports is impossible; many of us agree that baseball is the best but impractical on the beach. Beyond that, preferences vary. For beach sports, simplicity and silliness are key. Folks are less likely to get angry about getting hit with a ball if they’re also laughing at your attempts to catch, hit or kick it.
A sports editor on vacation is still a sports editor, so with nothing else to do, I came up with an informal ranking of beach sports based on the following criteria: complexity of rules, required coordination with others, space required, difficulty of play and audience enjoyment.
Here are some of my favorites:
Shaka ball
A new one for me, shaka ball is a mix of paddleball and foursquare, where the object is to serve a ball that lands in an opponent’s quadrant (referred to as a “slice”) before they can return the serve. Pros: fun to watch, only requires four players; cons: complicated rules, unnecessarily difficult due to wind conditions.
Bocce
If you have any Italian immigrants in your family, you’ve likely played this one. The purpose of bocce is to throw a wooden or clay ball at a smaller ball (called a “jack”) in an attempt to hit the jack with the bocce ball. Closest to the jack wins the point. Pros: easy to play, only requires two players, mostly wind-resistant; cons: requires a large court, boring to watch.
Football
Beach football works best if you bring one that soaks up water. Sure, you can get by with your favorite pigskin, but it’ll never be the same again once it’s been submerged in saltwater a few times. Get one that’s water-friendly if you want to make highlight-reel catches. Pros: fun to watch, easy to play, only requires two players; cons: a spectator is definitely getting hit (or at least splashed.)
Skip ball
OK, this one isn’t even a real sport but it is my favorite. All you need is a water-skipping ball and a partner. The purpose of this game is to throw the ball in such a way that it skips across or bounces on the surface of the water in front of your opponent while they try to catch it. When thrown properly, the ball skims past your opponent at a ridiculous speed before they can get a hand on it. Ideally, the ball also hits them on the way by. Pros: easy to play, only requires two players, fun to watch; cons: Lots and lots of chasing the ball down the shore and into the surf.
I think people enjoy the beach because it reminds them of childhood; time is largely meaningless, getting dirty is encouraged, and it’s always better with family and friends. Just like sports.
Philip Poe is sports editor.
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