Each year, Santa does his final interviews with the media two days before he begins his long Christmas Eve journey.
As it is with most journalists from all over the world, I made my interview request in October and being on the Nice List, I was given a preferential time slot for Thursday’s phone interview.
“I’m not going to answer any questions about politics,” Santa said. “It’s too depressing. So let’s just talk about the big day, OK?”
Santa said preparations this year have gone well for the most part.
“We really got off to a good start in production around the first of the year,” Santa said. “Plus, this year, kids were really good about getting their letters in the mail early, so we were able to get a jump on filling those wish lists.”
That is not to say there haven’t been a few obstacles to overcome.
“Oh, yes, something comes up every year that you don’t expect and you have to plan around it,” Santa said. “Blitzen pulled a hamstring on a training run in November somewhere over the Alps. We had him listed as “Questionable” for the big night. But his treatment is coming along really well and we upgraded him to “Probable” just this week.
If he can’t go, his back-up, Oscar, will fill in. Either way, I don’t anticipate any real issues. Oscar’s ready. He’s been practicing for 200 years, after all.”
Santa said that while this would be Oscar’s first Christmas Eve deployment, he has some experience pulling the sleigh.
“All of our back-up reindeer have lots of experience,” he explained. “Some people think we only use the reindeer once a year, but, hey, we live at the North Pole. That’s 300 miles from the nearest grocery store. So we use all of our reindeer whenever we have to run to the store or pick up other supplies. We take the sleigh out probably two to three times a week. Christmas Eve is different, of course, because it’s about a 5-million mile journey, as the reindeer flies.”
Closer to home, Santa said deliveries to the Golden Triangle generally go smoothly and on schedule.
“I have to compliment the kids in your area,” he said. “They go to bed early on Christmas Eve, which is really a big, big help to me. Every time a kid goes to sleep early, I make a note of it and they get a little something extra special the next year. It’s a win-win for everybody.”
Unfortunately, there are exceptions, he said.
“A few years ago, we did have three little boys in Columbus and twin sisters in Starkville who just pretended to be asleep, which never, ever works. So that slowed us down a little. We would up making a run down to Macon and over the Louisville that year until those kids went to sleep. That put us off schedule a little bit, but fortunately we were able to make up the time over in Alabama, where the children were all asleep by 9.”
Santa said this year, the list of children on the “Nice” list is especially long, which meant some of this elves have had to work overtime.
“It’s a good problem to have, though,” he said. “I just hope the kids on the Nice List don’t blow it here at the end. That happens a few times every year. A kid will be nice the whole year long, then just a day or two before Christmas, he or she thinks, “well, I’ve got it made,” and they mess up. You hate to see that.
“Just last year, there was this little boy right down there in West Point that had been so good, then two days before Christmas, he started disobeying his mom and mistreating his little sister. He wanted a pony that year and we had him a nice little pony picked out and all ready to go. He wound up getting Lincoln Logs instead. I hate it, but the rules are the rules.”
Santa said that after all these centuries, he still enjoys the work and has no plans for retirement.
“Look. For me, it’s a one-day-a-year job,” he said. “I work even fewer days than the legislature and don’t do near as much damage.”
With that, Santa bid me goodbye.
“I’ll flash Rudolph’s nose when I pass over your house,” he said.
Slim Smith is a columnist and feature writer for The Dispatch. His email address is [email protected].
You can help your community
Quality, in-depth journalism is essential to a healthy community. The Dispatch brings you the most complete reporting and insightful commentary in the Golden Triangle, but we need your help to continue our efforts. In the past week, our reporters have posted 43 articles to cdispatch.com. Please consider subscribing to our website for only $2.30 per week to help support local journalism and our community.